Things I still don’t get about Australia – No. 7
The Ashes and the obsession with cricket in general. I offer you Exhibit A:
The Chaser are always good for a chuckle, and I did laugh at this. But there’s still an underlying obsession with the weirdest sport ever invented. For Christ’s sake, the bloody game drags on for so fucking long that it has to be stopped at regular intervals to prevent players from dying of starvation or lack of sleep. And apparently this was recognized long before ElfNSafety was even thought of. Was cricket ever meant to be taken that seriously by it’s inventors? Surely not. Thankfully I’m not the only one who thinks there are one or two flaws in the game:
TEST match cricket was declared stupid last night after England drew with Australia despite being much, much worse at cricket than them.
England can now claim to be just as good as Australia as experts warned it will soon be impossible to attract young people into the game if you cannot win no matter how much better you are than your opponent.
Denys Finch-Hatton, consultant editor at Wisden, said: “Australia have essentially just drawn a test match against a team that seemed to consist mainly of second-hand furniture.”
He added: “I don’t know what that is, but it’s not sport.”
Australian captain Ricky Ponting said: “Excuse me, but what the fuck just happened here?”
UPDATE 3 YEARS LATER – So I’ve gone native and watch a lot of cricket now? And? Doesn’t mean I understand why nearly the whole country is obsessed by it.